EXPLORATION CAN CREATE CONFLICT AND MISUNDERSTANDING

Topic: Exploration can create conflict and misunderstanding
Title:When I Was A Sailor
Jessica,Wang

_____“Blue sky rising, carry me forever, southern light guide me on my journey… A new world discovered, like a waiting lover, willing to fulfil a fantasy…“ I was a sailor when I was young. To explore, to find treasures, to give people a better life by sitting with Poseidon on his golden cart, that is used to be my dream, but all the beauties disappeared at that day. The day which is the first time I found a land, I faced a fight because of that exploration, after running out of the disaster I have never set my foot on the deck of the ship again.
_____I can remember clearly every details of the day that we found the new land. It was a rainy day, the gulls were crying, and the white foam was flying. We had drifted on the sea for a long time. Eating the hope of find treasures and the belief of the exploration had already could not stop the hungry missing of home in people's heart. After lunch, I talked with other sailors in our small dirty room. Obviously, they all expected to return to the down-to-earth’s life.
"Who are we working for?" Jason asked, he is a lovely boy, just like me at that time.
"The king..."Tom answered, he is about 40 or 50 years old, a very bold man, I like him very much .
"What is his name?"
"Come on, Jase, who knows? I mean, who care?"
"Right, to find the land, bring treasures back, and gets some, is the most important thing."
"Then we can back to home, I can see my wife at that time, and my little girl, Susan." Tom said, a smile bloomed on his face, full of gentle.
"Wish we can back before the Christmas."
No one said anything else, suddenly, the room was quiet, I could even hear the sound of wind to dash against the desks. Every one fell into the memories about their sweet family. Everyone except me, I was not as same as them, I came here not for the king which I even do not know his name, or the money that can support my family, I was a 20-year-old boy who came there for my dream, for my belief--the exploration. I wanted to be a navigator when I even could not spell that word. I just put the paper boats into the sea, dreamed one day, I could go to explore, to find goods, to collect lands, to give people a better life. From I see, at that time, exploration is the most beautiful thing in the world. Now, as a sailor, I finally have a chance to make my dream to come true." A land! We find land!" someone was shouting. Without thinking we went out. Land! It is true! We find a land! Although because of the fog, we could not see it clearly, but golden beach, green trees. It is a land! I even could not describe how happy I was. Ship hugged the beach, we jumped into sand like a happy bird, singing and dancing.
_____Then, we met some people, native people. Looking into their eyes, I could perceive their panic. I can still remember it now, totally lost. They did not know what to do. Whispering and whispering, gradually, the fear in their eyes became anger. An old person finally opened his mouse, moved his lips, he said something to us .Unfortunately, no one knew what he was talking about, it sounds like a language, it must be a kind of language, because after he said, all the native people around him repeated his least sentence. I did not know what it mean, but by seeing the women hold children in the arm, hided behind the men, by seeing the men's hands grasped the spears and waved, I knew it must be unfriendly, they wanted to fight? But why? Looking follow their eyes, I found out the answer--some of us had already hold their guns. Metals were flashing under the sunshine, it was so dazzling that I had no idea what I should do, in fact, no one knew. "Damn! What are you doing! "Our captain shouted to the sailors who hold their guns." Put them away!" Those cowards were trembling, they put guns on the nearest place that around them. We all smiled to the native people, knowing that we can not use language to converse, so we tried to show our friendly by smiles. As a response, their chieftain shouted to us. I did not know what that mean, maybe that just a way to show friendly from them? I would never know, because, for his reaction, a coward shot. I knew the disaster was coming.
_____All of the native people roared, we were running, wanted to go back to the ship. Listening to the sound of wind around my ears, I also heard the painful yell, and the blood oozing out .Fire was burning into the horizon, that was a completely nightmare. Running without turning my head, shooting without looking at, I even do not know how I got back to the ship, I even do not want to know. I went back to my home finally, but I also know that Tom had never seen his wife or daughter again, and Jason could not hear ‘merry Christmas’ any more. I am one of the survivors of that exploration, but as same as other survivors, I prefer that I am not alive, death maybe easier. At that time, every night when I closed my eyes, I can saw helpless expression in my comrade-in-arms ' eyes, full of despair. ” help, help...”their hoarse sounds like the shrill song, hurt my ear drum. Every night at that time, I struggled to wake up, and then, tears converged into a river. I finally realized that exploration is not as beautiful as I thought. To find goods? To collect lands? To give a better life? They all build on millions of people‘s corpses. Exploration can create conflict and misunderstanding. From that time, I have never set my foot on the deck of the ship again.
_____Is that cowardly or just the right that people want to protect themselves? Is develop equal to bleed? Is that just the rules for exploration, or the human nature? Is the lack of communication the only object that should be blame? I have no ideas. What is the real face of exploration which being my belief for such a long time? What is the real face of mankind? I can not find the truth out, or I afraid off? At least, I am happy for that I am just an old person who watches the sun rise and set on horizon day by day, now.